Motherhood, pregnancy

Thoughts on Having my 2nd and 3rd So Close Together {+ How the 1st Trimester Has Gone}

In case you missed our announcement earlier this week, I’m currently pregnant with our third. If the baby comes right on his/her due date of January 10th, my 2nd and 3rd kids will be about a week shy of being 19 months apart.

However, since my second came exactly three weeks early, I have a pretty strong hunch that this baby is going to come before the end of the year, which means they’ll be more like 18 months apart.

Am I nervous about having kids so close together?


Most women who have two kids so close do it with their first two, and then space out the rest a little more generously. Since the decision of when we could start trying for our second child was out of our hands, it meant that we have over a 3-year gap between my first two, which is quite a bit more than we would have liked.

And, since we didn’t have our first until I was 28 and we’d like to have possibly four or five kids…

We realized we’re starting to run out of time, especially as we didn’t want to be having kids in our 40’s (I’ll be 33 when I have this baby, for the record).

But that’s not the main reason we decided not to wait.

If you’ve been a reader of the blog for any length of time, you’ll know that my faith is of the utmost importance to me. And one thing I believe in wholeheartedly is following through with divine promptings.

When I was still pregnant with Mathias (my second), I felt very strongly that we should not wait before trying to conceive again once he was born, and Matt felt the same way.

So that’s what I rely on when my brain starts trying to wrap around what it’s going to be like to have basically two babies in the house (one of whom can get into a lot more mischief than the other)—no matter what, I know that this is where our family is supposed to be at this time. And that is enormously reassuring.

Another thing that’s enormously reassuring?

Doing genealogy. It might sound kind of weird, but as I find these ancestors of mine who had 10, 12, 15 kids and who went through such hardships, it makes me feel like I can handle anything. I have many ancestors who crossed the plains as pioneers with their children, some of whom gave birth on the trail. To know that I have their blood running through me gives me strength to know that though it will be hard, I am more than up to the task.

As for how the first trimester has gone, well…

Let’s just say that the first trimester and I have never really gotten along well. For starters, I am pretty much guaranteed to be sick the whole time. I don’t usually throw up (though I did several times when pregnant with Mathias thanks to several stomach bugs), but I am nauseated pretty much around the clock, with it getting noticeably worse at night.

Last pregnancy, I decided to finally go on the anti-nausea meds my OB recommended, which made a world of difference. I went on them again this time around (promethazine, in case you’re wondering), and it does make it so that I’m semi-functional. But basically, I feel like the worst version of myself when I’m in the first trimester—I’m exhausted all the time, my moods tend to be unpredictable, I have zero motivation or energy to do housework or make meals (which means that we are currently living in a disaster zone and eating a lot of cereal and sandwiches), and my motivation to do anything but just lie there is just gone. Hence the reason why I haven’t been blogging or even reading much lately.

It’s a little rough.

This time around has been especially interesting because if you remember, I was feeling sick to my stomach for months BEFORE I was pregnant, so it made it pretty tricky with knowing how far along I was. I originally thought I was 3 weeks further along than I actually am, but both ultrasounds so far have confirmed a due date sometime in early January, so we’re sticking with that. It has meant, though, that I have basically been sick to my stomach for about five months straight now, which makes me definitely have way more sympathy for women who are sick their whole pregnancy through.

Fun fact (though not so fun in the consequences): Apparently, pregnancy makes my frugal ways go out the window a bit, at least in the first trimester. I’ve had cravings this time for all sorts of super healthy fare, like greasy KFC chicken, large cuts of medium-rare steak, and ice cold lemonade to wash it all down. Our budget always takes a MAJOR hit the first trimester!

Another unexpected thing with this pregnancy was that I had to stop nursing Mathias when he was 11 months old. My milk supply hadn’t been great anyway, but once I got pregnant, I was pretty sure he was hardly getting anything, so I finally just nursed him one last time on Mother’s Day and called it good.

And you know what?

It’s been kind of a relief. It’s been a relief to know that he was finally getting enough, and it was a relief to give my body that break. It also came with the added bonus of making my back feel better, since my PT was pretty sure it was largely hormones (mostly elastin) that were contributing to all the pain I was having.

If everything goes as expected, I should hopefully be feeling significantly better in a week or two, which I CANNOT WAIT FOR. I’m ready to have motivation to do All The Things again (you know it’s bad when I’m even excited to get the cleaning done!).

Thanks for all your well wishes and sweet comments on our last post, and we’re excited to share this next part of our journey with you!

P. S. This dress is another Old Navy find (non-maternity), and I am OBSESSED with it (affiliate link).

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