While I still haven’t quite gone through the whole list I made as part of my “Minimalist by 2024 Challenge,” I’ve still been continuing to peel off layer and layer of clutter as I get a spare minute, and the more simplicity I gain in my home, the more that I crave even more simplicity.
And while my decluttering muscles are decently strong after being on this minimalism journey for over a decade, I still find that this last push to really reach a truly “minimalist” state is proving to be the most tricky.
The biggest hurtle I face is my naturally frugal nature: I find myself frequently reminding myself of how often certain things have come in handy that I’ve saved for a long time, and that during particularly stressful financial seasons, I have indeed been glad for having held onto some things.
However, that logic certainly doesn’t apply to ALL the things I’ve held onto, which is where the sticking point lies.
This last year has been one of the most financially stressful years of my life, and I had to admit that even in such a tight state, I still wasn’t being helped along by the vast majority of the “stuff” I had — it was just adding more to my already very full plate.
My goal right now is to pare down our possessions to only the things we love and use right now, which is basically also my definition of minimalism. Sometimes I feel like we’re not *too* far off that goal, and other days–especially days that come after a long week when the house has been allowed to devolve into chaos–I feel like we still have a LONG way to go.
At any rate, I’m still working on it.
In case you find yourself in a similar boat where you’re trying to declutter your life, I hope sharing some of these questions I’ve been asking myself will help:
If I applied this to every member of the family, how many would we own?
I can’t remember what triggered me to start asking this question, but it’s been an eye opener for sure. I often find myself trying to rationalize a lot of things (especially the “just in case” stuff), and one area this happens with frequently is clothing. For example, “What if [insert kid’s name] leaves their jacket at school? OR this one gets wet? Better keep a couple spares just in case.” While there is definitely some truth in my rationalizations, the problem is this — if I keep a winter coat PLUS a spare winter coat PLUS a regular jacket PLUS 3 backup jackets, guess how many coats and jackets we would have for our family of 6?
THIRTY-SIX.
That is a LOT of winter-wear, my friends, and considering that it’s bulky and tends to get hung up by either our front or back door and we don’t have 36 hooks…yeah, it makes sense why I feel overwhelmed.
It’s been a fascinating exercise to do this with multiple types of items we’re all likely to have — bed sheets. Blankets. Books. Shoes. Stuffed animals (for each kid, anyway).
If I let each kid keep 20 stuffed animals, that’s 80 stuffed animals, guys!! No wonder I feel overrun by them!!
So we’ve started having to literally set limits on how many of each type of thing everyone is allowed to have so that we don’t get buried alive under the sheer weight of allowing everyone too many “just in case” things.
Would I pay to buy this again if it was lost/broken?
Soooo much of the stuff in our home we got for free. I’d actually venture to say that the MAJORITY of stuff in our home we got for free, either as a gift or as a hand-me-down. I’m actually extremely selective with what I will spend money on, so this is an excellent question for me when considering something I’m on the fence about.
(A partner question to this is also: “If this item were lost or somehow destroyed in a fire, would I even remember I’d had it?” Very illuminating when you stop and really consider it.)
So if I’m on the fence about something and think, “Nah, I wouldn’t spend money to get this again,” then that’s a pretty good indicator I should probably just let it go.
(On the flip side, I like what has become known in the minimalist realm as the 20/20 rule — if you can replace it for less than $20 and in less than 20 minutes, allow yourself to let it go, guilt-free. Chances are high you actually WON’T end up replacing it, but even if you do, you’ll know that it’s not the end of the world.)
Can I easily borrow or rent this in the future instead of owning it myself?
This is also a question I ask myself before bringing in NEW items (especially with farm stuff or big things like tools or power equipment or bulky kid stuff).
Basically, I’m trying to make it come down to this — if I use the item one time a year or less, try to find someone that could loan me that item in the future rather than taking up all the space to store it myself.
When it comes to certain things, this can be soooo hard, especially if we already own the item and if the item was relatively expensive (great example: camping gear). Matt and I have never actually gone camping since having kids, but yet we have still kept allllll of our camping gear when in reality, we could very easily find someone (I’m positive) who would be willing to loan us their gear if needed.
Good categories to apply this to:
- stuff for entertaining (including things like second crock pots as well as fancy serving dishes, punch bowls, etc.)
- camping gear
- tools
- yard equipment
- specialized sports equipment (i.e., ski gear)
- special occasion clothing
- bulky household tools like wet/dry vacs, carpet shampooers, etc.
- big baby items (like swings or bouncers) that are only used for a short season
Now, I’m totally guilty and own items in almost every single one of these categories. But slowly (slowly!) I really am starting to be able to let go of more and more of it, and it’s been SO FREEING (plus it encourages me to build closer relationships with more of the people who live around me!).
If I didn’t own this, what would I use instead?
In my eagerness to declutter, I have definitely already gotten rid of a few things where a couple months later, a member of my family asks, “Have you seen [insert decluttered item]? While the initial response is a pang of guilt when I remember that I actually got rid of said item, there hasn’t been a single thing that we’ve actually replaced — we just made do with something else, or with nothing at all.
It’s actually been pretty illuminating because it teaches me that we’re fairly resourceful and can usually substitute something else to meet the same need, and that if we can’t, we can either buy the item again (and know full well that it’s something we actually really want), or we can just make do without and go on our merry way.
A good category to apply this to is specialized-use gadgets, such as special veggie choppers, or items that are meant for a very specific purpose (like a magazine rack). If you have such an item and it isn’t being used for its intended purpose and just sitting there (or if you find yourself reaching for an alternate item just as often as you reach for that one), then just get rid of it — you can find something else to serve the same function just as well or do without.
Is this contributing to better mental health in some way by being (currently) useful and/or beautiful, or is this contributing to my stress levels?
When it comes down to it, the main reason I want to drastically declutter and simplify our home is because constantly trying to manage a chaotic, cluttered environment is not contributing to my mental health in any kind of positive way. When I’ve managed to drastically pare down our possessions in the past (and keep them drastically pared down), I felt like a more well rested, more capable person, and I felt like I could actually relax in our home because it didn’t feel like there was stuff screaming at me from every corner that needed to be dealt with.
So in the end, I need to prioritize my own well-being over the possessions in our home. When the other questions fail to motivate me, this last one is the one that helps me to push through and keep pushing through.
I know many of you are on decluttering or minimalism journeys as well. I’d love to know about some of the strategies and questions you use! Please drop a comment below and share your thoughts!
