The 8 Commandments of Baby Hair Accessories

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When we first started telling people we were going to have a little girl, almost every woman I talked to (okay, at least 50% of them) said something to the effect of: “Oh, you’re going to love dressing her! Little girls are just so much fun to accessorize.”

I thought the whole thing a little odd at first–like somehow this was the grown-up version of playing with paper dolls or trying out different outfits on Barbies.

Then I saw Raven in her first bow, and I’ll admit–my heart melted just a little (or a lot).

Since she doesn’t have a lot of hair to play with and those long dark lashes that I’m hoping will grow in (courtesy of her daddy’s genes) haven’t quite come in, it was like the bows and the ribbons and accessories gave her that extra little feminine edge (plus it meant that fewer people would mistake her for a little boy).

And I’ll admit–it’s been more fun than I’d thought.

BUT, we’ve had to set some basic ground rules about hairbows and other head accessories (a sentence I never thought I’d need to utter):

1 – Thou shalt not make the babe wear a bow whilst lounging about the house. We want Baby Girl to be as comfortable as possible, and we’re also slightly worried that if we leave those ribboned hairbows in too long, she might end up with a permanent indentation in her skull or a ring around her head where no hair grows. (Seriously, I’ve seen/heard of babies where it’s happened. The hairless ring, anyway.)

2 – Thou shalt not put a bow larger than 1/6th the size of the babe’s face upon her head. The flower bow above illustrates the largest we’ll ever get when it comes to hair accessories (so as to avoid comments about how our baby’s accessories are big enough to be picking up satellite t.v….or wavelengths from space.)

3 – Thou shalt, while in public, make sure the babe looks reasonably enough like a girl. Although I think Raven is absolutely adorable no matter what is on her head (or not), I finally was forced to stipulate that without the presence of certain accessories and dressed in certain colors–like the bright green above–I could see how someone might mistake her for a delightful little boy. Hence the reason I made an informal rule that when we’re out in public, I will do my best to make sure she looks like a little girl.

4 – Thou shalt remove the bow immediately when the babe sleepeth. After Raven pulled down her bow around her neck in her sleep–TWICE–we decided that, for safety reasons, bows are meant for babies who are awake.

 

5 – Thou shalt place the bow slightly off-center on the forehead for the most flattering look. (See, even Raven balked when we tried to break that rule–“Mom, the unicorn/Cyclops/that one Star Trek guy look is SO over.”)

6 – Thou shalt offer the babe a binky, breast, or knuckle immediately after placement of the bow so that she associates positive things with hairbows. (Okay, let’s just be honest–it’s because she hates them being put on and we’re trying to distract her.)

7 – Thou shalt share the adorableness with all. When a particularly hilarious hairbow is tried out, pictures must be sent to her daddy immediately so we can all have a good laugh together. When the hilarity is just too much to handle (like with the bonnet in the top picture), Mom and Baby must walk to Dad’s place of employment to show her off. That kind of ridiculous cuteness just must be shared in person.

8 – Thou shalt not have the mother and babe wear coordinating hairbows, despite Daddy’s urgings that it would be “funny for moms to wear the same bows as their daughters and in the same proportions to their own heads.”

Did we miss any Hairbows-for-Babies Commandments?

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